Sunday, December 27, 2009

TSA to require all passengers to be under general anesthesia for flights

Originally uploaded by martin_kalfatovic

WASHINGTON, DC - From its headquarters today, TSA officials announced that effective January 1, 2010, all passengers flying over US airspace will be required to be under general anesthesia. Flight attendants will be trained to administer the anesthesia after boarding. Some airlines have announced that in addition to an IV option, gas will be available for an additional fee (credit cards only please).

As a frequent flyer, I'm  concerned about air safety, however, some of the proposed new rules are going a bit too far - and some of the rumored rules are even worse!

One of the new rules, not allowing pilots to point out cities and landmarks as they fly over them, is just silly.  Having just flown to Boston from Washington, my pilot pointed out Trenton, NJ. I hope that Trentonites will feel safer from now on.

The above is a joke of course, but may not be that farfetched.  Uniform application of current precautions, proper screenings, and targeting the most likely threats will make for safer travel.

1 comment:

arhutch said...

My brother and I were talking about the ramifications. He mentioned the anesthesia but I don't know where he (and you) got that.

I wonder if one of two things might not happen:

First, there will be an extensive pre-screening option available to the wealthiest of passengers who will allow the TSA (perhaps months in advance) to inspect their personal records, financial, employment, residence and otherwise. This will isolate those who cannot or will not go through it and can therefore be more carefully scrutinized.

Second, I wonder if they could require all passengers to go into a changing room and deposit their clothes into a plastic sack, etc. while changing themselves into either sweat-pants or hospital scrubs or something similar.

No matter what happens, I can see a lot of grumbling from passengers, higher fares to pay for extra security measures, and ultimately, fewer people able or willing to fly.